A small god can manage the list of dos and don’ts that we have posted on the fridge. But only an infinitely big God can dole out grace in the huge amounts that we need every day. We make him small when we limit him to being the genie for our prayer requests.
Compared to what God expects of us as beings created specifically to love, worship and obey him- the most on fired up Christian only taps a minuscule fraction of their potential to live for god. And though I wound him daily with my self serving attitude, my lack of awe of his greatness and grace- he still comes back to me and says, you can do better, I know it because I made you. I know it because I love you like my own Son. We will never understand the depth of what he has done for us through the gospel. If we spent every waking minute of our lives pondering the peaks of gospel off in the distance, we would still never make it past the foothills.
Don’t be paralyzed by shame, but do continue daily repentance. Your salvation isn’t finished with the sinners prayer. But it moves toward the finish line as our hearts melt and change over God’s grace and response to our sin.